Thursday, 21 February 2013

I got my drawings from the picture framer today. They look really nice but it was obvious from the way he spoke that he didn't think my drawings were good enough - he even said they weren't sharp enough. I'm not expecting to have either of them chosen, I just feel that if I'm going to keep drawing and want to improve I need to take it more seriously and do it more often. Entering them for the RA Summer Exhibition is my first attempt to shift into the more serious realms. But I have to say that his comments really knocked me back. It was a bit of a "wake-up call" that actually I'm not that good. I've always felt this myself, or at least felt that whilst I might be quite good at copying I don't have enough creative and technical skills to call myself an artist. Hearing someone with an artistic background keep stressing that you're unlikely to be chosen and criticise the quality of the drawing is hard to take. I'll submit both of them as I've paid the fee and the cost of the framing, but now I'm seriously thinking I should give up on the drawing and accept that I'm just mediocre.

Couldn't find any random act of kindness to do either, so bit of a miserable day all round. Not feeling much like making shortbread for the dustmen!

Wednesday, 20 February 2013

I heard an item on the radio on Saturday where a woman was talking about her experience of embarking on random acts of kindness and one of the things that stuck in my mind was that she said she found the first 2 weeks really difficult. So I'm not surprised to find that less than a week in I'm already struggling.

I spend a lot of time working in isolation which I know means it's going to be hard to carry out spontaneous and random acts of kindness, but yesterday I had to go into the office and thought this would create some good opportunities, but it didn't. I could have paid for the coffee for the person behind me in the queue in the restaurant but I know he is very right-wing so there was no way I was going to buy his coffee! So I went to bed with a feeling of failure. At this point I'm thinking that I could end up incurring lots of expenditure over the next 12 months, as the easiest way to find acts of kindness involve me spending money. I'm going to try and stay positive - it is, after all, meant to be a positive process. Maybe the fact that I got a 25 pound win on the premium bonds at the weekend is a sign that I'm on the right track.

Still not sure what to do today, but I think I might make some shortbread tomorrow night to give to the dustmen on Friday.

Thinking about Jane who had her eye surgery on Tuesday, and hoping she is coping OK.

Tuesday, 19 February 2013

I can't believe how long it's been since I wrote in my blog.... so much has happened over the years since that last post... all good!

I'm back because I want to record a new challenge I've set myself: to do random acts of kindness for as many days as I can over the coming year. I have a feeling I wont manage every day but I'm not going to let that stop me.

I started on Saturday, 16 February but only now decided to record the acts on my blog. Here's my first acts"

Tuesday, 19 February: bought a copy of "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain from Amazon and had them ship it to Jane who is scheduled for eye surgery today.

Monday, 18 February: Sent a card with a photo of San Francisco fog to Jane Howard. I met Jane a few weeks ago when I was in Nevis. She's a friend of the person who let me sleep in her spare room while I was visiting Penny in the house opposite.... long and complex story! It turns out that Jane lives in Woodford Green, just a stone's throw from where I grew up; she has connections with San Francisco (through her son) and she did an art degree at Central St Martins. We got on really well and met up again on Saturday, 16 February at the National Portrait Gallery for the Man Ray exhibition. She's persuaded me to submit a couple of drawings to the Royal Academy Summer Exhibition. I'm not sure about it but have committed to doing it as long as she does the same. Hopefully she will be well enough after the eye surgery she has to have to produce something in time.

Sunday, 17 February: a jogger dropped a £5 note when he ran past me. I could have just picked it up but instead I shouted at him and kept shouting but he didn't respond. So I kept the £5 and gave a donation to an animal charity.

Saturday, 16 February: gave the guy selling Big Issue an additional 2.50 for the magazine. It was a really interesting edition so I got my payback straight away.